Imagine you’re the coach and have the following player on your team:

• 24 years old, 6’8” power forward/center.

• A really solid defender – who can defend out on the wing if needed.

• Averages 20 points, 10 rebounds, 2 assists, 1.6 blocks and 1.0 steals per 36 minutes.

• While offensively limited, has a true shooting percentage of 67.0%, with a league-average usage rate of 19.9% – and finds a way to score 20 points per 36 minutes without anything needing to be called for him.

• An awesome PER of 26.0.

Now select from one of the following options:

• Play him 30-35 minutes a night. No need to overthink this one.

• Play him 25-30 minutes a night. Perhaps because you’re one of those ‘keep ’em hungry’ kind of coaches.

• Play him 20-25 minutes a night, because you’re not the most observant kind of coach.

• Play him 15-20 minutes a night, because you’re a stupid fucking idiot whose brain literally does not function – to the point where this player’s playing time is purely the product of you accidentally pushing him on to the court as you flap around the sideline wildly in an indiscriminate fashion.

• Play him 11.6 minutes per night, while giving the likes of Wesley Johnson 24.5 minutes per game, Jamil Wilson 15.5 minutes per game, Sam Dekker 12.5 minutes per game and your incompetent son an insane and indefensible 33.1 FUCKING MINUTES PER GAME – because you want to be just like Doc Rivers.

Fuck me blind.

How much longer can this go on?